The Mother of All Bunk Beds Posts!

Ever since we embarked on the bunk bed journey with our kiddos, my e-mail, blog, and Instagram have been flooded with questions about how we make it work, so today I'm dedicating the whole post to answering all of your questions about bunk beds!

1. Where did you get your bunk beds?

Our kid's sleep setup has me so happy these days! The bunk bed frame is this one and stained with a white wash eco-friendly wood stain. I'm often asked about the stain and sadly I forget which company makes the stain, but just ask your hardware store for a wood stain that is safe for children/animals/the environment and they'll show you the one! I found the pine on the frame too yellow-y but I love the look of wood too, so a white stain is perfect. You can still see the knots from the pine and there's no glossy varnish either, so it's very much a natural feel.

2. Where did you get their mattresses?

We recently changed up the kid's mattresses in partnership with Casper and we couldn't be happier with them! Many of you have asked how the Casper twin sized mattresses are for kids because they're on the softer side. To me, this is 100% a strength of the Casper mattress. The memory foam isn't a bouncy mattress, so your kids can't bounce off or get very high if they're jumping on them, so I'd say they're a safer option for kids! They are also insanely comfortable. Lily and I are the nappers of the family and within the first week she and I had already had a couple of naps on her twin sized mattress, haha! I'm telling you, tucking in the kids and saying bedtime prayers has never been more of a challenge! I just want to join them for the night! For $75 off any size Casper mattress, just use this link.

Until now, our kids had some very old hand-me-down mattresses on their triple bunk and as they're getting older and growing like weeds, we felt it was time for them to have a more supportive bed. They'll have these mattresses for the next 10+ years so I'm glad we chose now to switch them out. They say to replace your mattress every ten years, and ten years from now our older two will already be off to college and Chloe will be 15! What!! Cue tears.

3. Where did you get their bedding?

We've had a few bedding options over the years but the past three years we've been settled on simple white sheets and duvets with a pop of colour in their pillow cases. With three kids, both girls and a boy sharing one small space, I think it's important to keep things simple and neutral. All of the white linens are from IKEA. I know the arguments for allowing your kids to create and design their own beds/spaces/rooms, but I can't help but think it's rather indulgent. My children would probably all love some sort of Disney themed bedding on each of their bunks (even though they've never seen a Disney film, lol) but they're also really happy with their room and have never complained. I picked up several vintage pillow cases from the thrift store one day and told them they could each choose one for their bed. They were thrilled! Oli has orange floral, Chloe has blue and green stripes, and Lily has white with a few multi-coloured flowers. The pop of colour is fun along with their various books, Lego, toys, costumes, and stuffed animals, but the bedding and walls and most of the furniture is white. I like the balance and white bedding makes the room look so tidy when they beds are made (when being the operative term!)

4. Did you always have bunk beds for your kids? How old were your kids when you introduced bunk beds?

We started out with a twin bed with a trundle frame underneath for Lily and Oli, back when Chloe was a baby. When Chloe was ready to leave her crib (18 months or so?), we transitioned to the bunk bed. At first, she was sleeping on the pack and play mattress on the floor and Lily and Oli were on the bottom bunk and floor bunk of the bunk bed, but by the time Chloe was 2.5 (and Oli was 4 and Lily was 5) we had all three on the triple bunk.

5. Who sleeps on which bunk?

This is such a popular question! The answer is - we change all the time! Normally Oli takes the top bunk because he wakes up last, so as the girls are leaving the bedroom he isn't disturbed. We have a little clip on light on his top bunk so when he tiptoes into their room and the girls are fast asleep (he's our night owl), he can just click it on and it's not bright enough to disturb them. The girls alternate between bottom and floor bunks almost nightly, and occasionally Oli ventures down and one of the girls migrates up too. Another reason I love neutral bedding is that they can switch beds any time and still feel like it's theirs.

6. Are you afraid of someone falling off the top bunk/ ladder?

Not now, but we were at the beginning. Before we'd let our kids sleep on the top bunk they had to prove to us that they could climb up and down effortlessly. Oddly enough, our oldest child had the hardest time with this, so she was the last one to sleep on top! I know bunk bed manufacturers have age limits that they're forced to set, but for us we cared more about our children's physical abilities to climb up and down (in the dark, too), and their maturity to follow rules for safety.

7. Is changing the top bunk the bane of your existence?

It's really not that bad! Especially with such a low top bunk - the Mydal bunk bed is very low to the ground  compared to some other bunks, so that might be why (plus I'm really tall!) I definitely find bunk beds a pain to change, including the bottom bunk where I'm often hitting my head or back on the top bunk frame, but for us it wasn't enough of a hassle to even come close to changing our mind about having them.

8. How did you choose the bunk bed you now have?

I did a ton of research before deciding on the kid's bunk bed frame. I wanted something simple and streamline - so many bunk beds are hugely bulky and take up way too much space (the very problem we were hoping to solve by going with bunk beds!) Cost was definitely a factor too. I'd rather my kids have amazing mattresses and cheap bed frames and sheets than splurge on the bed frame.

9. Do you have a trundle frame on the bottom bunk?

We actually don't! It's just a mattress on the floor and we pull it out each night and push it in each morning. Because we have wood floors, it slides so easily, but this might be harder with carpet. The bunk bed frame was too small to allow for a trundle frame underneath, but it fits a mattress nicely.

10. Do you have any safety measures for the bunk beds?

We do! We only allow one child at a time on the top bunk, even during the day for playtime. And one child is allowed at a time on the ladder too. I know a lot of kids see a bunk bed as a jungle gym but we've been really strict and consistent with our kids, so for them it's just a place to sleep and build forts on the bottom bunk, of course. And no jumping, which as I said above, isn't really a problem with Casper mattresses.

11. How long do you foresee your kids sleeping in the triple bunk?

Great question! We have no plans to move from our little two bedroom nest in the near future, which means our kids will continue to enjoy the triple bunk for now. Right now they're all about to have birthdays and turn 5, 7, and 8, and they still love sharing a room (and triple bunk!) I think whenever we do move to a three bedroom condo, Oli will eventually have his own room and the girls will be together. I think we'll give Oli the triple bunk and give the girls a queen sized bed to share which will then be the guest room whenever family comes into town, and the kids can relive their glory days of the triple bunk in Oli's room :)

Coming soon will be a post answering all of your shared room questions, so feel free to submit them below in the comments section or to ask me on Instagram and I'll include them in my post!

Thanks again to Casper for sponsoring this post and gifting these mattresses. We truly love them and found the experience of ordering mattresses online a breeze. I don't know about you but I often suffer from paralysis of choice when I'm shopping, and buying our last mattress was absolutely overwhelming. Casper has done endless testing and research to find the most comfortable fit for the widest majority of sleepers, and the result is truly the most comfortable mattress I've ever slept on, trust me! And if you don't love it, you have 100 nights to test drive your mattress before returning it for a full refund. And you can test them in various stores and pop up shops around the country, so there's really no risk, just a much easier experience. If you have any other questions feel free to ask me, or come by our place for a test nap, haha! Also, here again is the link to save $75 on any Casper Mattress - http://www.casper.com/friends/EMMORRICE

5 ways we foster sibling relationships

Our kids have a pretty tight bond, thus far in life. Maybe it's because they're born within four years of each other, or because they share a bedroom and almost all of their time, space, and possessions with one another. But I hope we've done a few things to foster their relationship as well.

Here are a few things we've learned from other parents, or developed ourselves in this parenting journey, to foster sibling relationships. I'd love to hear things you've done as well!

1. Your sibling is your best friend. Period. This is a mantra of sorts, and we say it to them all.the.time. It's a joyous statement when things are going well, it's a correction when someone has been unkind, it's an encouragement when they're struggling to treat each other well. Say something enough and they'll believe it, so they say.
2. Making sure they get a lot of time together. This became especially important when Lily started school last year and they weren't together all day every day anymore. It's easy to pack your kid's schedules with birthday parties and activities but we are really intentional in keeping it light and open. We say no to a lot of things so the three of them can be together more. They probably won't remember the names of half the kids they went to kindergarten with, but their siblings will be there for the long haul, so that's the relationship we want to focus on.
3. Plant the idea of service and giving in their hearts towards their siblings. Kids are naturally selfish (like all of us!) and probably won't think of these things on their own, so give them the ideas. If I'm doing groceries with Oli, for example, I might ask him, "hey what's a food that Lily especially loves? Why don't you go pick it out and we'll surprise her with it". Or before they start their nightly show, I'll whisper in Lily's ear, "wouldn't it be nice to let Oli pick the show tonight, even though it's your turn? That would be so loving and special!". They usually get really excited about it once you get them going.
4. Zero tolerance policy for meanness. I had friends growing up who were completely awful to their siblings, and somehow it was just accepted by their parents and never punished. And we've all seen the movies where the big brother is a total bully to his younger brother, and there seems to be no one really caring or putting a stop to it. Our kids get immediate time outs if they say a mean comment to their siblings, hurt them in some way, or are acting unkind toward one another. These things do happen! It's easy to catch since they're together so often, so we try to nip it in the bud early on.
5. Target the heart, not behaviour. It's easy to just say, "no hitting!" and punish it in such a way that they no longer hit. But has their heart towards their sibling changed? Instead of focusing on the outward behaviour, we try to focus on the character and the heart that is wayward. Hitting a sibling is wrong, but the root issue is anger, jealousy, selfishness, or a plethora of other sins. We try to target the root issue instead of the outward behaviour, and point them back to the God who rescues us from our sinful selves, by sending Jesus in our place. We don't want them to view their siblings as a reason that they got punished, either, so disciplining them this way helps in that respect because it ends with grace and reconciliation, not shame and punishment. 

 

a quick trip to Ontario!

Last week we went on a quick trip to Ontario, just the kids and I. I've done the drive from Montreal to Niagara about 10 times, but I'm always surprised at how well it goes (and how long it feels towards the end!),  especially being on my own with the three meatballs. I'm planning a post about roadtripping with kids soon, for those who have asked!

Lily had the Friday off school already, so we left as soon as she came home from school for lunch on Thursday. Our first stop was Guelph to spend a few days with Vanessa and her amazing boys. Vanessa has such a heart for true hospitality. Not worldly hospitality, as in, entertaining and putting on a show for guests, but the real deal. The heart that says be at home here, if you're under my roof, you're part of my family. I love her.

I was always nervous about having a son because I grew up with just girls in my family (and the boys I saw at the park and around town were always so hyper and violent!). When I found out that I was having a boy, I actually cried! Scared, not happy tears! Of course, there's more to a person's character than their sex, and I quickly learned that you can raise a sensitive, caring boy, but I wish I had of known Vanessa's boys back when I was nervous about having boys. Her sons are so sweet, fun, thoughtful, and adorable. I don't care which two marry my daughters, so long as it happens! LOL.

While V's two older boys were in school on Friday, we took advantage of only having five kids in our charge and went out for the day. We stopped at this lovely cafe, The Common. It was dreamy! Open and bright, warm and rustic. Kids, adults, creatives, professionals, happily mingling to the sweet smell of roasted coffee. Discovering new cafes with my tribe is absolutely one of my happy places, so it was extra special when a photographer who was working at The Common stopped us and offered to snap a picture. I've shared his info on Instagram if you're in the Guelph/Toronto area. So thankful for a souvenir of that sweet day.

Next we headed down to Niagara for a very short but incredibly special visit with my newborn niece, Addison. Originally I was planning to take the train down by myself to meet her, but then Addie was born four weeks early so I had to bring the kiddos. Since I was just in Toronto for Lisa's shower, brad couldn't take more time off work to watch the kids. In the end I'm actually really thankful the kids came. It was precious to see them react to their first cousin.

Being around two mothers of newborns, within such a short time brought back all the feelings! I especially remembered the emotional roller coaster of doubt, fear, guilt, pride that breastfeeding brought on (you can read what I've written on that in the past here.)

We only stayed one night in Niagara and drove the eight hours back to Montreal the next day. It was a long drive, but my heart was full from sweet friendship, family, and basking in the miracle of little Addie.

life lately, à la Instagram

If you follow me on Instagram, some of these pics are old hat (though not all of them have been posted there), but I wanted to share them here anyway. Which brings about some thoughts:

a) I love instagram and wish everyone I knew had it. I feel that way about blogs too, fyi. It's the easiest way to keep up with someone's life in this busy age! With two kids and a bun in the oven I don't have a lot of free time for my peeps here in Montreal let alone for long distance phone calls to my friends and family in Ontario and around the globe. Of course, I try and family and friends are a priority, but I LOVE the simplicity of popping online and seeing pictures from THAT DAY in their lives. It's so up-to-date. Life in the 21st century rocks.

b) If we're friends and I don't have you on Insta, LET ME KNOW. Also, add me, players!

c) When the weather is beautiful like this, especially in Montreal after a 6 month winter that rendered us hermits, you just don't blog so often! I am maximizing my time with the kids outside, knowing by late summer I'll be so pregnant it'll be hard to be as active and intentional. Hence, lots of binge blogging + scheduled posts, and a lot of photo dumps.

d) Related to c: warm weather and being outside is just way way way better for taking pictures. I'm doing that a lot, but mostly on the iPhone not so much my nice camera. Woops.

Here we go.

different parks every day (even a suburban one while we were picking up Craigslist cloth diapers for baby #3!) ///
eating lunch on the go and outside, ah such a sign of summer! /// 
Granna (Brad's mom) came for a long weekend and we all L O V E D it! ///
Oli and I stumbled upon a literal hidden gem - an organic + local restaurant that was very affordable, and we had to cross a lot of dirt to get to it! Worth it for the season's best for under $8! (on a daycare day) ///
I've been having smoothies for breakfast every morning for a while now. With feeding the kids and getting them up and ready, it's the only way I can nourish myself right away in a healthy way. Plus they're tasty! ///
we're enjoying our terrace in FULL SWING now! I've done a lot of gardening (my first time!) and the kids love the play set we got 2 years ago on Craigslist. It's permanently dirty and dusty out there though, so we play in the afternoons after the parks and then go straight to the bath!

Pictures of BOTH kids. Together.

Lately I've been able to capture the kids together a lot and I wanted to do a little photo dump to prove it. I know the more kids we have the harder it will be to get them captured together, because it's already hard with just two! So here's our last few days. And a fun giveaway is coming your way later this afternoon!

Have you seen blogs doing the photo series of their children where they take a picture of their kids on the corresponding number date of the month? Like, if they have 5 kids, they take a picture and post it, of all 5, on the 5th? That might be a great way to remember and motivate to get pictures of the siblings together, especially after baby3 comes... if only I could remember the date! Oh mom brain :)

How do you prioritize pictures of ALL your kids? Or better yet, the whole fam?
We haven't done one since Christmas...

the *NEW* kid's room

With baby 3 on the way, and as my kids + style change, I thought it was time for a quick nursery re-do. Most everything in our kid's room was a DIY, bought secondhand, gifted, thrifted, or free, so I felt like spending a bit of money to freshen things up was alright. And thanks to IKEA a little goes a long way!

I'm a big fan of kid's rooms being free from too much of a theme. That's why I love neutral or white walls and furniture - you can do so much with it and change it whenever! To me, themes pass quickly and I get bored of the same thing everywhere, plus it's hard to incorporate more toys/things into a room once you have a theme because it's often hard to find the perfect match. So free from any major theme, I wanted to bring the room together a bit with colours and patters. The kid's room started out as very white/grey and then slowly tons of colours (mostly pastels.... how did that happen!?) and patterns were added and eventually it all felt messy to me, even when clean. Just cluttered and too busy. So I wanted to stick with a few patterns and colours - bold grey, turquoise, and yellow, but mainly grey.

I LOVE the end result!!

I went to IKEA the other day in search of a few things to transform the kid's room - blackout curtains and blinds (hoping to also transform their recent late bedtime and early waketime!), official bedding for Lily (she has a plain duvet before), and future bedding for Oli that matched but wasn't identical (we're getting a trundle bed for under Lily's instead of bunk beds since they're both still so young). I love the combination of the two duvet cover sets I got for the kids! Lily's is slightly more feminine but neither of overly "boy-ish" or "girlie". Just like my kiddos :)

The window coverings were another big change. I used to have a DIY "black out" curtain in orange and then the door window was covered by a beige checkered piece of fabric. Both did the job, but I wasn't crazy about the colour combo, the fabrics, or the amount of black out they offered. I replaced the beige fabric with another piece I had lying around - one that was more spunky and bold (and bonus: it is upholstery fabric whereas the other one was cotton, so it lets in less light). While at IKEA I lucked out to find a single panel of black out curtains, in dark grey, for $10! I knew right away that I'd put off on the blackout blindes and see how this worked. Very happy with the coverage and price!

Just so we're clear, it wasn't actually night (probably obvious) in the second picture. Just what I hope will feel like night during Oli's morning nap and the kid's 7pm bedtime as the days get longer :)

Next up was final touches! I took down the hoop-la on the wall of Lily's bed for two reasons: firstly, Lily likes to climb on the toy chest and take them off at night (which is easy because they're so light), and secondly, because I wanted to streamline the fabric and colours in the space. I kept my two favourites which seemed perfect for a co-ed bedroom (the mustache and the red/pink ikat). To fill the wall and replace the hoops I bought these three prints. Aren't they adorable!? $15 for the group of them, and then a $6 frame for each. This part of my decorating was definitely the most costly, but I love how the art can grow with them (it's not too childish) and how it fits in with our family's style and our actual interests. At age 1.5 and 2.5 the kiddies have already been to 2/3 of the locations in the prints! And I love that the art focuses on cities - our heart beats for cities and I love displaying reminders of that around our home.

I also added a fun pillow (which matches our living room rug!) to the crib and replaced two mis-matched pillow cases with matching grey ones. I already owned the pillows, just bought the cases. I'll be putting up a felt ball garland on the wall of the city prints. And psssst: there is a giveaway coming your way soon to win a felt ball garland like mine from One Balloon! 

THE BREAKDOWN:

2 grey pillow cases.........................$30

Lily's bedding.................................$25

Oli's bedding.....................................$8

Crib pillow......................................$10

Art.................................................$15

Frames............................................$18

Curtain............................................free

Black-out curtain............................$10

Kid's *NEW* Room Total.........$116

Oh, and just in case you're wondering about some of the other things in their room...

Lily's quilted dress pillow is from Liz Taylor Handmade, The needle point art of a Lady and Gentleman were found on the side of the road (but are so symbolic of my kids. HA.), Lily's bed was $15 from Salvation Army, Oli's crib is DaVinci, the white dresser was $25 at a garage sale and re-purposed by us, the reading corner is actually an old ottoman covered in a piece of thrifted fabric, the balloon throw pillow on the ottoman was from a store in Montreal (now closed), the rocking horse was made by Lily's great-grand-father Murdock (my step-mom-in-law's father, such a lovely man), the turquoise and blue rocking chairs were both thrifted, the white toy chest was found on the side of the road and re-purposed by us, the Africa and China pillows are from Once Was Lost, the yellow blanket on Lily's bed was thrifted, the rug was $30 from IKEA, and the mobile is Cookie & Curly.

what do your kids DO all day!?

I always want to know from other parents, 'cause half the time I'm out of ideas. The reality is, we live in a small condo in a very cold city that is not easily accessible by strollers/families/handicapped folks. So if it's cold (colder than -5 or -10, say), we stay inside, like, ALL DAY. Which means November-March we are inside almost every day, all day, unless I'm driving somewhere (no more than 1-2 times per week) or I'm feeling crazy brave, or I have extra help.

Other than two glorious days a week where my 2.5 year old is at daycare, I have a 1.5 year old and a 2.5 year old to entertain all day, most days, inside. Except Spring/Summer/Autumn where we try to be outside every day, but it's Montreal and winters are loooong. Oh, and when the baby comes in September, I'm guessing that means even Autumn will become an indoor affair. So, what do we do all day!?

Right now the kids are rocking a 3 hour nap, both from 10am-1pm. It's crazy amazing and I'm so lucky. I know it could change in a few months (or tomorrow), like their schedules tend to do every so often, but for now it's bliss. So mornings tend to be breakfast as soon as they wake (they are hungry beasts!) then independent play or reading together. The main toys for that right now are the play kitchen and accompanying goods (tea set, play food, etc), Lily's Island of Misfit Toys dollhouse that I recently bought (for a $1 players!), and Oli's toy barn and animals. That's another hour down, usually.

After they wake up from their nap it's lunch (right away again) then time for mom to think up something for them to do until dinner at 5pm. So 4 hours. How to fill it? TV is reserved for my dinner prep or if someone (including me) is losing it. Colouring has become a huge interest for both kids. When it gets boring, I switch materials. We start with pencil crayons, move to crayons, and a couple times a week I let Lily paint. In total though, this is only 45 minutes max.

More independent play and reading usually follows. I think it's great when kids have the chance to just be bored. They think up the funniest ways to occupy themselves - like hiding under blankets or pretending to call their friends on the TV remotes :)

They also love puzzles right now and we have a ton of wooden ones. Some thrifted, some gifted. Lily is so fast at doing them these days but gets so furious when Oli takes her pieces out of their spots. But the boy loves those pieces...

Lily is also huge into diapering right now. Maybe 'cause she sees me do it so often? And we cloth diaper so she is often helping with folding/stuffing them. I recently had a brilliant idea and bought some discounted $5 newborn cloth diaper covers which she uses on her dolls. But if I forget to close the closet door she gets into her favourite diapers - the disposables - and goes to town with her dolls and animals. I think she idolizes Michelle Duggar.

Then usually an hour a day or so is accounted for by them just "helping" me do my thing. Empty the dishwasher, fold laundry, make beds, tidy toys, cook/bake, whatever. It's win-win if they're interested that day, because I actually get stuff done. And like I said, once it's 4;00 or 4:30 I have no problem with giving them 20 minutes of TV so I can make dinner without ankle biters! Our favourite shows right now on You Tube via Apple TV are Small Potatoes and Num Tums.

How do you keep your kids occupied during the day? Particularly when it's a day inside?

mélange

The Internet has been awesome lately! Also, I've begun reading my blogs via Feedly, instead of my old fav, Google Reader. Verdict? Feedly is wayyyy better, more user friendly, easier to access on the iPhone, and has cool features that GR is sadly lacking. Feedly has a "save for later" feature that I've used for the last couple weeks to collect all of the posts I want to link up with when I finally got around to writing a mélange post. So easy! Here they are, hope you're inspired today friends.

• I've mentioned that we've begun praying with Lily on a nightly basis but what about praying for our children? I'm sure most Christian parents do pray for their kids, but maybe you're like us and do it randomly and without a ton of focus? I found this article incredibly helpful and motivating to be specific and purposeful as I pray for my littles.
• I loved this post on living with kids in a meaningful way. Teaching, mentoring, disciplining, all intentionally. A lofty task that I admit I'm not up to every day, but I want to be!
• Tonight I made Earl Grey Tea cupcakes with Earl Grey Tea butter cream icing and OH MY GOODNESS TRY IT.  I used this recipe for the cupcakes and I doubled the amount of loose leaf tea required (and used David's Tea Cream of Earl Grey). For the butter cream, I made my own with this simple tip (Great butter cream is 1:4 ratio of butter and icing sugar with a dash of 35% cream and vanilla, plus in my case, loose leaf Earl Grey)

• The pathetic attempts schools are making to ratify bullying, from a mother's perspective. I so appreciated reading this, and her opinion that it's not enough, as one who was badly bullied for years in elementary school.
• I can't even believe the name of this recipe, let alone how delicious it probably is. The name says it all: Chocolate Chip Bacon Orange pancakes.
• now that the weather is finally getting nicer, I can get some of the spray-paint-related projects done in the coming weeks. SO exciting. My parents bought our kids the amazingly priced IKEA children's table + 2 chairs for Christmas and I haven't assembled it yet because I'm waiting to paint the pieces first, then assemble. I was going to do all yellow (and we're going to buy two of these white chairs to add to the two yellow ones) but now I'm not so sure after this, this, and this!

source

• Have you ever thought about what extracurricular activities you'll out your kids in and how many? We're basically settled on "one or none" (at a time, per kid) thanks to these great parenting talks and Jen's recommendation, but this post reminded me why that's so important. I saw her schedule and felt sick and stressed - and it wasn't even mine!
• Aaaaaand just like that, I'm done my 1st trimester! Thank you, Lord! Also, you can now vote whether you think Baby3 will be a boy or girl on the Baby Bump Blog. We find out April 30th, and for the record, I think it's a girl ;)
• If you have a lot of kids but not bedrooms, I'm a fan of giving the kids the master bedroom, if it works. In our case, we have doors to the back terrace and an open concept ensuite in our bedroom, so it wouldn't be the best choice for kids. But I love what this NYC family did with their master bedroom - cutest co-ed kid's room EVER.

"the world is built for families of four"

psssst: don't forget to enter the Roving Ovine doll giveaway!

I'm drawing the winner on Friday morning and there are 4 ways to win!

Have you ever heard that expression? I had, long before we even had kids, but as we were considering having a third baby, we heard it a lot more frequently.

It's true isn't it? Hotel rooms, cars, most family-sized homes, vacation packages. They're all made for four people. Of course there are other options out there: get a hotel room with a cot, buy a van, put two kids in each room, get creative with holidays. But the point is, it's easiest to just stop at two kids. I get it, but obviously, we're not. Heck, I hope we don't stop at three kids!

But it can be discouraging for a parent. After Oli was born a lot of people assumed we were done having kids altogether. Forget the fact that we were vocal about wanting to adopt additional children, I heard "so, you're done?" all the time. Especially because we had a boy and a girl. Why keep going when all is so perfect? Simple - that's never what we've wanted.

We believe we have enough room in our hearts, in our home, and in our budget for more than two kids. It's not that we're not happy now or that Lily and Oli have left us lacking. If anything, I think it's a compliment to our children than we don't want to stop! Another Lilygirl or Oliboy? PLEASE, YES!

And it's funny, because many of you reading this come from completely different situations. More than two children is probably not even a question for some of you. You'll get to that place when it's time to decide on having baby number 5 or 6! But in my context, I assure you, it's uncommon. Our neighbours think we're weird. I'm the only mom in my Mom's Group with two children. Brad is the only dad on his hockey team with two children. Growing up the vast majority of my friends were from families of two kids. The church I attended all throughout university wasn't brimming with large families as many, I know, tend to be. And we'll be the first family in our own church to have three children (though, granted, there are only 4 families!).

Sometimes I need to give myself a pep talk, because it will be tough. And if the world is built for families of four, the city is built for families of two or one. Our closest grocery stores don't even have child seats in the shopping carts and it's rare to see a minivan. And here we are, dreaming of having a big (for us) family. Honestly, I read blogs like Moments With Love and I just adore the idea of a HUGE family, filled with biological and adopted brothers and sisters. But I also remember that she lives in an American suburb in a giant house and drives a crazy long van, and that's just not what God has called us to as urban church planters in Montreal.

But we are certain we want more children, so we'll take hotel rooms with cots or pull-out couches, the minivan (SO weird to have one in our neighbourhood), bunk beds, and creative holidays. The world isn't built for it, but I think we were.

What about you?

Can you relate to wanting a large family despite the set backs or pressure to keep your family smaller?

Or do you feel opposite pressure - to have a larger family? I know people who are in this boat.

What motivated you to have the # of kids you've had?

What deters you from having a larger family?

I'd love to hear your thoughts!

Olivier, where did the year go?

Today Olivier is ONE. As in, no longer a "baby". And I just don't know where the year went.

It's been so accurately said that the early season of parenting is marked by long days and short years. This was definitely a short year full of long days.

Oli was a bit harder to "sleep train" than Lily (even though we started sooner), so the early weeks were tough. But I knew more as a mom. Trusted myself more. Believed in my God-given abilities more. So even though they were harder days, with an extra kiddie in tow, I might be inclined to say they were better than Lily's early days. Which were often marked by doubt, frustration, fear, and confusion.

But like his sister, when he started sleeping through the night (around 3-4 months, can't really remember now) it was a whole new world for me. He was always a joy (deep deep down) but once I was less sleep deprived and was holding my own, I was able to really enJOY him. And oh, how I have.

Oli's smile is so bright, even more so now that he has five teeth in it. His eyes have become so blue though we thought he'd have Brad's brown eyes as he takes after B in almost every physical area otherwise. His crawl is rapid fast and he usually giggles with every step. He's pulling himself to standing and loves the play kitchen. Good thing he has aptly-named heroes like Jamie Oliver to look up to if he decides to keep that up :) But more likely, my gourmet Dad and his chef uncle Rob in that department.

No one makes him laugh like Lily and he seems to love trying to impress her as of late. He waves at us from across a room and is starting to blow kisses, which obviously melt me down to a puddle. His hair has began to curl in the last few months and his natural side part makes him look very French, people say.

Olivier, I long to know you better. I can't wait for the day you can tell me what you're thinking. Because I'm already so in love with my role as your Mama, and I know each year it will only get sweeter. You are the sweetest boy and I cherish you, my son.

I promise this year to stop calling you Kitten Boy and my Boyfriend and other embarrassing names because I know in Toddler-ville you'll have a reputation to hold on to ;)
I promise to keep praying for you. For you to grow up into a strong, healthy man one day. And for the little girl who will one day, Lord-willing, be your wife.
I promise to teach you about Jesus and pray one day you'll love him like me and Daddy do.

I've been loving you for 1 year and 9 months as of today. What a gift you are.

Oli @ 10 months

Oli is about to turn 10 months old. Hold me. 

He's so precious to us. 

The kid smiles like you wouldn't believe. Complete strangers come up to me and say "he was smiling at me from across the store/road/room!" And I love that. He's definitely a conversation starter and an ice breaker. Which is especially helpful in French!  

O lala! Un gros souris pour un petit gars! 

At 10 months, he's got two teeth (bottom two) with the top ones just about to come in. He's sitting up by himself and can get there on his own from lying down. Such a big milestone and I remember so clearly when Lily did the same. Because it made nights (and is making nights) a lot harder.  It's a short transition period, but right now Oli can sit up but he can't lay down from sitting, so he gets up, and is stuck. 

So nights look like this: 

Tuck him in, lay him down. 

Hear him crying, go in to find him rubbing his eyes and sitting upright. 

Lay him back down. 

Repeat. 128769832764 times.

But his cuteness helps a ton :)

Speaking of cuteness, Lily makes him laugh like no body else. Melt my heart. Yesterday I walked into their room and he was laughing hysterically and she was dancing for him. She's a show boat and he's an easy laugh so they're a great team. She's also big on trying to feed him and help in any way. It adds work for me at this stage, but it's so cute seeing her play "Mom" and it's great for their bonding. Until I found a Goldfish cracker in his mouth. That wasn't cool. 

Other than Goldfish, he eats everything.under.the.sun. Feeding a baby is the easiest thing. We take whatever Lily didn't eat, blend it, and serve it to Oli. He's our garbage disposal, we joke. The other day I blended leftover tilapia and tomatoes in garlic sauce, added some rice cereal to thicken it up and relax the flavours a bit, and he polished it off so fast. Petit Gourmande!

He's also starting to army-crawl, take shorter/fewer naps, babble a ton, and get curls. 

Oli, you have blessed our family immeasurably these last 10 months. 

You are loved and cherished my boy. 

ps - a Lily update is comin' soon :)