Half Birthdays and the Best Cake Ever

As I'm sure is the case for most people, the lingering Pandemic has led to a good degree of languishing in our home. Generally we've been fine, but with every sport and activity cancelled for the past 16 months and very limited contact with friends and family, some weeks have been harder than others. Mid-winter I found myself longing for something to celebrate. 

The kids and I all had our birthdays in the late summer and autumn, and Christmas was behind us. We still had months until Brad's May birthday and Mother's and Father's day too. So I decided that we'd celebrate half birthdays this year. I know, I know, it's a bit excessive, but seriously it was one of the best decisions I made in the Pandemic (that and buying the kids a mini trampoline!) 

Sally Clarkson in The Life-Giving Home writes about how important it is to make home that place of comfort, celebration, joy, and safety, and I have been so influenced by her practices. Though the Pandemic is *hopefully* winding down, I think we'll keep half birthdays forever for the joy they've brought us, and that additional chance to celebrate each member of our family. 

It's amazing how much those half birthdays brightened our home life! I had been meaning to try out Livia Sweets that opened up down the street and this felt like the perfect occasion. So for Chloe's 7.5 birthday, we ordered their birthday cake. Montreal friends, OMG. The birthday cake was the best cake we've ever had. While Livia Sweets did gift my family the kid's half birthday cakes, I have already personally bought two more, they're that good. My mother-in-law had her birthday two weeks after Chloe's half birthday and I promptly ordered it again. Lily and I are heading up north this weekend for a Mother-Daughter camp and you know I ordered us the two person birthday cake to eat when we arrive. This cake is truly beyond.

You can order this dream cake, or anything else on their delicious menu (including cookies and dairy-free milk delivered to your door!) from Livia Sweets. Save on the delivery fee like I did by picking it up at their storefront on 288 Ave Laurier Ouest. 

This post was in collaboration with Livia Sweets,

but all opinions are 100% my own and I am a regular customer of theirs. 

To book a collab, contact me!

Combating Screen Addition and Our Love of Board Games

This Christmas, like every other in our recent family history, we're giving our kids several board games. Growing up I wasn't particularly into board games and might have joked that they should be called bored games on more than one occasion 😅, but I've come to love them, partly because we've found some truly exciting and fun games, and because I know how great they are for kids and families. 

Spending too much time on screens is linked to poor sleep habits, social problems, attention issues, difficulty regulating emotions, and general lethargy.  Educators have noticed that children who spend more time on screens have lower grades, enjoy reading less, and have trouble staying on track than their peers who have less screen exposure. What troubles me more than any of this is how little research has been conducted on the long-term impact of screens and social media on children and teens. Anyone born in the last 20 years is truly a guinea pig when it comes to screens and we just don't know the full scope of what it does to kids. With all that in mind, Brad and I have been cautious with introducing screens to our kids and tried to limit them significantly in favour of imaginative play, reading, physical activity, and board games. 

As a family, we'll definitely spend our fair share of time snuggled up on the couch watching Christmas movies over the break, but generally screen time is limited to 1-2 hours on weekends. Our kids don't play video games, they don't use e-mail, they don't have personal devices, and they don't watch a lot of popular media. I know screens aren't going anywhere and with online learning being a real part of our lives it's unrealistic to not allow our children any access to them, but we do everything we can to be wise about how much we allow and the context for screens in our home. 

Our kids genuinely don't feel they're missing out because we've been able to find some great activities and hobbies for them. I wanted to talk about board games in this post specifically as I know many of you will be looking for gift ideas this week! As I said, I haven't always been a board game fan because I find the super strategy ones too intense and not social enough (I'm more of a charades girl myself!), but Brad has always been a fan and over the years he's done lots of research on playability to find games I'll like and that work with our kids ages (now, 7-10). Here's a list of our favourite board games. It's going to be a long winter and I know we'll be playing them quite often! Maybe you'll find one for your family as well :) 

• Azul (my absolute fav and great for kids and adults alike!)
• Ticket to Ride Europe (the original is very fun but the Europe version is more complicated with tunnels and ferries, plus we love the European cities!)
• Stone Age (such a beautiful, tactile game of civilizations)
• Harry Potter Hogwarts Battle (this is one of the kids' Christmas gifts and they're going to be obsessed!)
• Dix It (for the social players like me this ones great!)
• Caverna (a strategy game about building and decorating your own cave)

This year we had the good fortune to work with Asmodee Games, which is easily our favourite Game company. They make all of our favourites and they gifted us a few on this list, others, also by Asmodee, we purchased ourselves because we really love them!

Honestly, for any parents worrying that their kids are growing dependent on screens, the best advice I can give you is to provide them exciting, engaging alternatives. With the pandemic a lot of extra curriculars have been cancelled so there's more time at home than ever, but board games are a great option. Playing together, we have more family conversation than watching films allows, and we're finding it's a wonderful way to make memories and bond as a family. 

This post was in collaboration with Asmodee Games.

All opinions are 100% my own.

To book a collaboration, contact me!

How We Came to Celebrate Advent, What It Means to Us, and How to Get Started

Are you familiar with the Advent season? Are you wondering how early to begin with your small children, or how to engage your older ones? Are you wondering if it's too late to start Advent or that it would be too complicated? Friends, I'd love to help by sharing our experience. 

I was not raised celebrating the season of Advent. The chocolate Advent calendars which always began on December 1st were as close as I got to the season. Many years later when Brad and I both became Christians, and eventually became parents, we knew we wanted to mark Christmas with joyful celebration and profound reflection so we thought a lot about how we'd do that with a young family. Early on, we decided not to include Santa in our Christmas festivities (though we have always given presents and most years we've had a tree). It wasn't for many more years though, that we'd incorporate Advent into our Christmas Festivities. 

Advent is the season preceding Christmas and is marked by celebrating the four Sundays before December 25th. For this reason, the date of Advent is always changing (it's Sunday, November 29th this year). Most liturgical churches celebrate Advent (think Anglican, Catholic, etc) but few Evangelical churches do, though that's changing. I believe our generation's desire for deeper roots and the comfort of traditions is what's leading many Evangelical churches and Christians to begin celebrating Advent. It's certainly what has drawn me in these past few years, but I digress. Advent is leading up to Christmas and aims to awaken joy and anticipation for the day of days, Christmas! When Christians all over the world celebrate the dawn of Salvation. The beginning of the greatest story ever told. The birth of the King.

There are countless ways one can celebrate Advent. Some celebrate Advent only on the four Sundays before December 25th, others (like us) celebrate every day of Advent, or every few days when schedules allow (also us). We intend to gather around the table and celebrate Advent every evening, but some days we run out of time or someone is ill or we're too tired and we say without guilt, tomorrow! Advent is a reminder of God's grace to us, so please don't let it turn into an obligation or source of guilt. If you miss a night, pick it up the next. If you miss a week, pick it up the next. If you're missing many evenings, consider that you've over-complicated Advent and simplify. 

 

For my family, Advent always includes the lighting of candles, the singing of a Christmas carol (which truly are the best worship songs ever written!) and the reading of scripture and memorizing of scripture (one naturally leads to the other), and is generally 10 minutes per day.

The symbolism of lighting four candles progressively through Advent is beautiful and tactile and one of my favourite parts! Young children are always in awe of flames, made even more special if other lights are dimmed, so as long as they are seated a safe distance away, I suggest using candles even from a young age. You don't need to spend a lot of money on a candleholder either. I've owned three over the years - two were thrifted for a few dollars and another was a $10 Ikea bargain. Or use whatever candles you have on hand. The point is light - representing Christ, the light of the world. We light one candle the first week, then the second week we light the first week's candle and the second candle, and so on. When all four candles are blazing, our hearts are too! It's a beautiful way to anticipate Christmas. 

The singing of carols began as a desire to teach our kids the lyrics to all the classics, especially since our church is French so they weren't learning them there. As our kids have grown it's sweet to hear them sing every word of some of our most cherished carols, Hark! The Herald Angels Sing, Joy to the World, O Come O Come Emmanuel, O Come All Ye Faithful, and Silent Night. I found an old Hymn book secondhand that has a whole Christmas section, so we sing from that but you could do any simple Google search to find the lyrics to your favourites. We choose a few each Advent and rotate through them until everyone knows the words. This is especially great for little ones who can't read but after repeated listening can memorize. 

Reading and memorizing scripture is the third aspect of Advent for us, and each year we change the passage. One year we read John 1:1-12 every day of Advent and by the second week my kids were finishing my sentences and eventually knew it all by heart. There were no drills or contests, simply the daily practice of reading the Bible. Other years we've read the Old Testament prophesies of the Messiah (which were all fulfilled by Jesus Christ) or Romans 5:1-11, which isn't particularly Christmas-sy but is focused completely on the gospel. You could choose any passage! For us, the importance was just being in the Word together, taking it to heart, and focusing on the eternal promises of God in a season that highlights such temporary joys. 

Our kids were 3, 5, and 6 when we celebrated Advent for the first time. Inspired by a thoughtful mom friend (hi Brit!), I found a candle holder at a thrift store for a few dollars and bought some secondhand children's books that focused on the nativity. We gathered around the candles, lighting one each week and read a story. Later we'd add Christmas hymns and scripture, and the story would be read during other times in the day. It was simple, even with young kids, and oh so meaningful. 

Christmas so often seems to sneak up on us, doesn't it? The week before we're often frantic, racing to bake and buy and decorate, and the truth is, in all of this activity our faith can often take a back seat. The aim of Advent is to delight our hearts in Christ, who came at Christmas to save us from our sins. Starting a full four weeks ahead of Christmas gives us ample time to linger with the Christmas story, meditate on scripture, and form new habits. I don't know about you, but I'm terrible at waiting. Advent turns my impatience into joyful reflection with these small acts of lighting a candle and singing a carol. Advent has become in itself something we look forward to, which makes Christmas seem much richer and longer a holiday. 

Advent teaches us to wait well; refocusing our hearts on the real meaning of Christmas, lessening the power that temporary treasures have on our hearts, and savour the saviour. This year is our forth year celebrating Advent and these last four Christmases have truly been the best ones. We arrive at the tree on Christmas morning not looking for the gifts to fill us, but with hearts already full of joy and worship. Jesus Christ is our greatest gift and Advent builds our affections so well.

 ps - Tomorrow I'll be sharing some of my favourite tools (devotionals, games, books) that I bring out at Advent each year and help enrich the season, if you'd like some more practical suggestions!

We've Never Done "Santa" and the Kids Are Alright!

We're that family that doesn't do Santa at Christmastime. The more I talk about this online, the more I realize there are actually many families like ours, and at the very least, there are many families out there with a bit of dissonance around the whole thing. If you'd like to read a detailed post on why we don't do Santa, see here, and if you'd like to read my most recent musings on why it's been a great decision for us, see here. I can now say, as a parent of kids who are past the Santa age (they're 7, 9, and 10) that it was the right decision for us and our kids are quite alright!

Today I wanted to tackle a few often asked questions. Especially with all three being school aged how did they handle the Santa secret with their peers, and how did we navigate the many Santa-themed activities they do at school, and aren't they feeling a bit left out?

Keeping The Secret 

We've always insisted that our kids don't spoil the secret for others. It's the choice of every individual family and we're not about to have our kids hurting feelings over a fun tradition. That said, last year two of our kids were asked head on from peers if they believed in Santa. This is where it gets awkward, because we don't want them to lie for obvious reasons. 

We've taught the kids to say, "I personally don't believe in Santa, but you can believe whatever you want!" 

They don't say why they don't believe (because we told them the truth!) as that would probably convince their peers and we have no interest in making other kids not believe in something that's special for them. I think it's so important for kids to learn from a young age that it's okay to have opposing beliefs and to communicate them respectfully. 

Santa Themed Activities

Our kids have all attended public school with the exception of Oli beginning homeschool this year. This means come December, every craft has a Santa theme and every song is about him. Honestly, I just let it go. Our kids know full well that he's not real but it's fun to participate in these songs and crafts at school. As with many things in life, they've learned that they won't always share the beliefs of their peers and that doesn't mean they need to break fellowship with them or be offended by everything.

Feeling Left Out? 

I'm often asked if our kids are left out by the lack of "magic" that Santa provides for the Holidays. I can say confidently that this has never been the case for our kids! As Christians, Christmas is magic because God became man and dwelt among us, and because that miracle means life everlasting for all who love him. There is nothing more magical than this beautiful news! We focus our hearts on the joys of the season beginning with Advent (this year it's November 29th, fyi!) and for the next four weeks we're constantly coming back to encouraging Bible verses and our favourite Christmas songs. The anticipation that Advent provides to Christmas is amazing and makes the Holiday last longer. I'll be writing about Advent this week for anyone interested!

This may go without saying, but our kids still receive gifts on Christmas morning like any other Santa-believing children. They're not missing out! The added benefit is that instead of them thinking the gifts came from a fictitious character, they understand that they came from their parents who love them, and they can practice gratitude practically. Our kids look forward to Advent and Christmas all year round and have the fondest memories of our Christmas traditions. 

To be honest I'm glad we're past the Santa years (generally by grade 2 kids no longer believe in him, from what I understand) so it's no longer a *thing*. We have no regrets in not including Santa in our Christmas festivities and we've been able to teach so many life lessons as a result. We've been able to magnify the importance of Christmas as Christians and not get distracted by competing narratives, our kids have learned to speak confidently about their beliefs in a respectful way, and they've learned that there will be many times in life that they don't see the world the same way as their friends - and they can be both bold and loving in those times and maintain fellowship despite differences. 

Having a Newborn in the Pandemic

Perhaps some of you reading this are pregnant or hope to be pregnant, and the pandemic has brought about concerns greater than the typical pregnancy or conception worries. Maybe some of you are new moms, facing all of the firsts in a Covid-era seperated from the "village" that you assumed would be your help. I have many friends who have conceived and given birth since Covid-19 arrived on Canadian shores in early March, and one of them was brave enough to share her story for a video series my church has recently produced. 

Noemie was one of my first friends in Montreal, and was a key member of my "village" as I was pregnant with Oli and Chloe. She would take Lily for playdates when I needed to nap, often cooked meals for our family, and even showed up with a bottle of wine when all three of my kids contracted lice! I was delighted to hear that she was pregnant with her first baby and dreamed of the many ways I would support her as she supported me. Then Covid hit.  Visits, babysitting, and special deliveries brightened the hazy newborn days for me, and for first time moms during this pandemic, they've been lost. This is worthy of our grief. Noemie shares her experience in the French video below. I hope you'll watch it, and I hope it brings comfort to any who are in the same situation. Hugs to all the mamas. XO

The Kids' Shared Tween Room!

As always, our three kids, girls and a boy, happily share a room. I know this is scandalous to some, but it works for our fam! Over the years our kids have grown incredibly close and I think it's in large part thanks to them sharing their toys, books, and space constantly. Some day we do hope to move to a slightly larger apartment in the city and have three bedrooms, which would provide a bedroom for two of the kids to share, and one solo kid room, but that's not happening any time soon. Our kids understand this, and any of their friends who have siblings share a room too - it's city life! But as they get older we have made a few changes which culminated in this bedroom makeover with the goal to keep them as happy as possible in their shared space.

Decorating for a shared room with girls and a boy has it's challenges, but typically my style is quite neutral anyway, so it works for us. I've always aimed to keep their furniture and bedding white and let them add colour with their favourite objects, toys, and artwork. To see the kids' room before this makeover, see here. We used to have grey and white striped walls (which I painted nine years ago!) and mainly white bedding and furniture. It felt very personal and bright, but it was starting to feel a bit kidd-ish, especially since the kids' room hadn't seem any major changes since the kids were toddlers. Lily in particular, who is about to turn 10, has started wishing her bedroom was a bit more grown up. Oli, who's almost 9, is easygoing about their room, but he's starting homeschooling in the Fall so I was interested in making some sort of desk corner for his work during the day. Chloe, who is almost 7 didn't care what I did as long as I kept a place for her stuffed animals and her owl collection ♡

The biggest change was painting over the grey stripes with a warm white (Benjamin Moore's Chantilly Lace). I didn't realize what terrible shape the walls were in until I painted over the countless scuffs and stains. Nine years and three kids can do a lot of damage! Painting the trim was so gratifying! It's such an easy chore and makes a huge difference. 

Another big change was the kids' bedding. I teamed up with Maison Tess to try out their new kid's line of Muslin bedding. I'm usually kind of colour-phobic and keep things as neutral as possible, but their colours are so beautiful!! We chose the Amber Muslin Duvet Cover for Oli's bottom bunk and the Rose Muslin Duvet Cover for Lily's top bunk, both with a Whisper White Muslin pillowcases. Since the floor trundle bed isn't seen during the day, we've planned to keep our regular white duvet there. 

These duvet covers are incredibly soft and look even better with several washings. They're so soft we have no need for a flat sheet and even on hot nights the kids insist on using their duvets! You may remember that Brad and I also use Maison Tess linens so we already knew we'd love the product. They're handmade in Portugal and the quality is unmatched. I also love Maison Tess for being a women-led Montreal small business. Initially I wanted linen for the kids' room because it's what we have and we love it, but Muslin is truly the perfect kid's fabric. It feels like every kid's favourite blanket!

I also reorganized the kids' books and bought two new bookshelves to house their growing library. Tip: Making stacks of large book series saves a lot of space on the shelves and it's sometimes easier on the eyes than the rainbow coloured spines 😂

The large chest of drawers holds all of our Playmobil and some of our boardgames. Each child also has their own drawer for their personal treasures. Their closet keeps all of their clothing, costumes, and countless bins of Lego. The mirror on top is a new addition, something I found for $10 last summer while thrifting. It makes the room look larger and Lily especially loves it! The tall book shelf with two drawers is where the play food and doll clothes live. It may look like they have no toys, but they have a fair bit, just tucked away. I assure you, during the day it's never this clean, but we have a rule that around 3pm each day they need to pick up their room. With three kids in one room, it's impossible to keep it clean for long, but I also figure with three pairs of hands, the work to keep it clean should be light. 

This makeover took 12 hours and was a whirlwind (it's amazing what you can do when childcare is incredibly scarce and you find yourself with a few hours of it!) I painted the first coat of paint when a friend of ours offered to take the kids out for ice cream and some park time for a couple of hours. While the paint was drying, I fed the kids dinner, hung out with them, and tucked them in on our pull-out couch. With the help of Melatonin, they were all asleep very early (6:30pm) and far from their bedroom. I finished the second coat of paint at 8:30pm. I then painted the trim and did some touch-ups on their mid-century desk while the paint was drying. by 10:30pm the paint was fairly dry so I started moving the furniture around a bit and cleaned the floors where I'd dripped paint. Their new duvet covers were stuffed, beds were made, all furniture was placed and the room was cleaned by 1:00am. The next day I was literally limping! I didn't realize it at the time but painting is hard work!! I was in rough shape for the next 24 hours, but it was worth it to finish a burdensome project so quickly and surprise the kids in the morning. 

I'm thrilled with the end result and so are the kids! Their room feels more mature, organized, and fresh and at little cost of money or time. We still have another two or three years in this apartment before we'll be ready to leave and I think they'll be happy in this tween space until then. 

Sources:

Bunk beds, floating shelf, two bookcases, white lamp on desk, circle rug - Ikea

Oval couch (actually an ottoman covered with a spare linen sheet) - thrifted 

White chest of drawers - Goldtex Kids (see here for post)

Top and bottom bunk linens - Maison Tess kid's collection (coming Summer 2020!)

Bird wall art, mirror, accessories on dresser, Chloe's owls, most books - thrifted

Mid-century desk - roadside find (see here for the transformation!)

Desk chair - Prunelle (similar also on Amazon, Structube, etc)

Top bunk dress pillow - H&M Home

Bottom bunk dress pillow - Indigo

This post was in collaboration with Maison Tess

All opinions are 100% my own.

To book a collab, contact me!

Going Back to Work After 10 Years At Home

When I began my maternity leave with Lily I had no idea that I'd be home as the primary caregiver for my children for the next decade. And now, ten years after becoming a mom for the first time, I'm working outside the home again.

The kids and I out for ice cream with my work friends
(both girls are wearing shorts from Mini-Cycle and Oli's t-shirt is from them, too!)

We always took me being a stay-at-home-mom one year at a time, so all I knew at the start was that I'd be home for the next 12 months, thanks to the generous maternity leave offered by the Canadian government. I had a double university degree and a job I loved, plus, as an extrovert I enjoyed spending my days with dozens of people in a professional capacity. However, we'd always lived frugally and always wanted several kids in a small span of time, both of which led us to being a one income family and me as the primary caregiver. 

I learned I was pregnant with Oli when Lily was just four months old, so instead of going back to work after my maternity leave ended, I was preparing to give birth again. Without any nearby family to step in, we were raising two babies on our own. Both Brad and I working 40+ hours a week on top of caring for our babies would have been extremely chaotic. Totally possible (and I know it's done all the time), but not what we wanted if we had the choice. My income was missed, but Brad's increased a bit and we weren't spending anything on childcare on top of finding other ways to save money (cloth diapering, buying only used clothing, and living quite simply saved us thousands). 

While I wasn't making money, I was incredibly fulfilled with Motherhood. I loved our comforting routine, the flexibility we had without work or daycare, and being there for every little moment. I loved that I was the main influence in our children's lives and that they too were together all day, forging an incredible bond. And surprisingly, I didn't miss work at all. I've always been ambitious, so when I became a mother my ambition just pivoted to our kids and our home from my previous work.  

Chloe came along less than two years after Oli, completing our family, and for a couple of years we had all three children at home together. It was loud, chaotic, exhausting, and wonderful. Lily started kindergarten at age five and I began taking on writing work and growing this blog to the place where I was accepting sponsorships and collaborations when they felt right for me and my message. Writing and blog work continued for the next five years, as it does today, but that was all working from home and easy to fit in around naps and quiet times. Even when Chloe began kindergarten last year, our schedule was quite full and the kids still needed me a great deal. Adjusting to school in a new language, extra-curriculars, church involvement, volunteering, and keeping our home kept us all busy, and Brad was by then working quite long hours. 

For ten years Brad and I never once questioned our decision for me to pull back professionally and be a full-time homemaker. But as the kids grew and our life settled into a routine, we both began to see time that I could invest outward again. Over the past year we had many discussions about what it would look like for me to take on work outside the home. I wasn't looking to work full time and I wanted evenings and weekends off. Ideally, I'd find something that was precisely when the kids were in school (9-3) and that was a great fit for me personally, lining up with my values. This felt like a unicorn of a job posting and not one I'd likely find, but that's exactly what happened when I was offered a job with Boutique Mini-Cycle. 

You've read about Boutique Mini-Cycle on the blog, and know I love to shop secondhand and local. Their business model lines up perfectly with things I'm passionate about  - sustainability, thrifting, reusing, capsule wardrobes, and simple design. For those who don't know, Boutique Mini-Cycle is a Montreal-based children's clothing shop that sells sustainably made and high quality brands, as well as secondhand clothing. Their new and used clothes are all beautifully designed and well made (no fast fashion!) and they guarantee to buy back the clothes you buy from them when you're finished with them. The best past was that upon being hired I was given the choice to work as much or as little as I'd like when in the office, so I could coordinate with Brad and the kid's schedules. I now work every Monday (Brad's day off) from 9-4 at Boutique Mini-Cycle taking pictures, organizing and valuing secondhand pieces and then another ten hours from home creating content for their site.  

While it's just part-time, it's been a big shift for our family. I have less time with Brad, missing the whole day that he's off (he works the other six days a week), so we need to be more intentional about guarding our evenings together, but on the plus side, Brad gets more quality time with the kids. I enjoy my work so much that it often feels like a break from regular life (especially the past three months of homeschooling). My colleagues are lovely and the work environment is so positive and stress-free. The added income is a huge bonus too, as we look forward to paying for braces and semi-private highschool in the years to come.

I had initially thought that starting in September when the kids were back at school would be the best time to look for a job, but when I was offered employment during the Pandemic I jumped at the opportunity to be out of the house for a day each week (with social distancing measures in the office, to be sure). I am a homebody and love being with my kids, and for the past ten years I've had no regrets as a stay-at-home-mom, but this new season feels like the perfect fit for our family and I'm so ready to take the next steps. 

Summer Learning Bundle!

By now I know we're all *quite* over distance education, endless zoom calls, and makeshift homeschooling. I've learned so much by homeschooling through a pandemic, but I can't wait to shift to a more relaxed and natural style of teaching my kids through the summer months. 

I've written before about summer learning loss, and teachers assure me (as well as overwhelming research) that kids lose acquired knowledge over the summer months if they aren't mentally stimulated. I discovered this Summer Learning Bundle and wanted to share it with you, as we'll be using it this summer to encourage curiosity and learning. It involves poetry, nature journals, crafts, literacy and math boosting games, and so much more. 

This certainly does not look like homeschooling all summer (can I get a NO THANK YOU!?) but it involves incorporating words, numbers, language, and critical thinking into the relaxing summer days when you can. I have no schedule in the summer - we follow the sun and are often out of the house from breakfast until bedtime, so if you're picturing us around the table studying all summer, trust me that's NOT what I have in mind here! I always pack some books, spare paper and pencils in my backpack when we set out, and I'll definitely be printing a few sheets from the bundle each time.

There are resources from 30 different contributors from all over the world and it's valued at $500, but this week it's going for $25! It's only available for one week so if you're interested make sure you grab it by Sunday, June 21! 

full disclosure: I received a free copy of the Summer Learning Bundle to test out. All opinions are 100% my own.

What I've Learned Homeschooling in a Pandemic

If you'd asked me before March 12th what I'd rather avoid, homeschooling might have topped living through a pandemic. At the very least, both ideas gave a similarly negative notion. From the beginning of my parenting journey, which is approaching a decade, I've felt passionate about our family being active members in the community, and teaching this value to our children early on, beginning with public education.

Before COVID-19, all three of our kids were in public schools in Montreal (to my European friends, this means free, government-funded); our girls were in grades one and four at our neighbourhood catchment school, and our son was in grade two at a "gifted" school a couple of neighbourhoods away. There we befriended the neighbourhood kids, teachers and parents. We invited teachers over for lunch, got to know dozens of families, and had friendships go from saying "bonjour!" at school drop off to crying together over the death of a parent or being the last ones in a restaraunt nearing midnight. 

Long story short, we love our local school! We love that our neighbours all send their children there, and that most of the teachers also live locally. We've spent hundreds of hours as classroom volunteers, field trip parents, and special guests in the classrooms of our kids and have placed a very high value on our own friendships with fellow school parents. These are our people and we love them and this is exactly the place where we see our children and our family. 

Had the pandemic not have forced our hand, we would not have homeschooled our children, but still, I'm grateful for the opportunity. I understand that homeschooling in a pandemic is different in many ways than regular homeschooling - the confinement being the largest aspect - but what I have learned during this season will stay with me as a parent and has informed future decisions. 

photo by @camdgenereux

We typically start homeschooling right after breakfast and I teach for one to two hours per child. Some days this can happen simultaneously, which makes our "school day" really short and sweet. Other days, it's a six hour day of running frantically from child to child constantly reorienting myself between subject matter and learning style. 

The learning curve was incredibly steep at first, I don't mind admitting. I love change and yet also have a knack for structure so I welcomed the new season of homeschooling and quickly formed a routine. That first week was exciting and fairly smooth with all of us enjoying it. The seamless bliss was not to last, however. The second week I began to doubt myself and felt a lot of anxiety with three different teachers (at two different schools) e-mailing countless documents of ideas, suggestions, and instructions. There were more resources available than we could ever get through or benefit from, and sifting through it all was a very unpleasant task. Here in Quebec, homeschooling has technically been called "optional" during the confinement, yet the teachers have been sending countless documents, websites, apps, and new platforms for learning almost daily. I had to decipher what was necessary (numbers, words, and in our case, the French language) between what was optional (class Zoom meetings, interactive projects and activities) and then choose what I would prioritize for my three students. It was overwhelming.

On week three, I think I hit my groove, at least for a while (remember Brad and I's parenting motto? Nothing is too good, or too bad, for too long!) I'll share more specifics about our homeschooling days in another post, but briefly, I found a schedule that worked best for us (homeschooling from after breakfast until lunch, with the afternoon free for physical activities and reading) and narrowed in on what I wanted my kids to work on academically during this season. I bought some math workbooks online for the kids and have made up reading and writing projects for my older two, and focused on fluidity and ease in reading French with Chloe. 

What I've loved the most about homeschooling is the simplicity of schedule and quality time together. We are always intentional about our kids not being over-scheduled, and yet still life seems chaotic most days because of the school schedule. The girls leave the house at 8:10am for school, then I drive thirty minutes to Oli's school, drop him off, and drive 30 minutes home. In a few hours, the girls come home for lunch and an hour, then return. At 3:30pm I'm driving another thirty minutes to pick up Oli while the girls walk home to Brad. Oli and I are home at 4:30pm and then everyone does homework, most days until supper. Then it's the race to have time together, take showers and baths, and get to bed early enough so the early wake up isn't too painful. Educating them at home is so peaceful, so much less hurry and stress, and we're always together. 

Sounds glorious right? But that last bit about always being together can certainly fall into the category of challenges too. Having my three, who are so close in age, all home together means I'm not worried about "social interaction" one bit. It's not safe right now for them to play with their friends and none of them are really interested in Zoom calls, but the constant togetherness can pose challenges. I also find it hard to teach my kids things I'm not passionate about. All parents are teachers from day one, but the lessons and habits we instill in our children usually matter a great deal to us. We care about their character, their behaviour, and their worldviews. I also care a great deal about literature, so I love teaching them to read and helping them find books they'll love and characters they'll identify with. Am I passionate about science and math? Not so much. Thankfully Brad really loves those subjects, so when he's able to take a short break from work he'll often pop in and offer a lesson on electricity or fractions. But what if he weren't available, or neither of us were capable to teach those subjects well? Homeschooling is tricky in that respect. Thankfully at grades 1 and 4, and a gifted grade 2 (which is closer to grade 5), I can still handle their subjects and provide them with satisfactory teaching and help. Daily I think about how blessed we are to have kids in these fairly early grades during the Pandemic. They're old enough to learn independently (most of the time!) and young enough that if this semester doesn't go so well, they'll have plenty of time to bounce back from our mistakes! 

To close, I'll just add that I know it's a significant privilege that I've been able to be homeschooling my kids during the COVID-19 Pandemic. Though I do still take on some work from home, I've been able to be home with my kids and invest in their learning. We've had the money to buy extra school supplies and my mental health is strong enough to deal with the daily changing realities while teaching three grades. I know this is an enormous blessing and not one that every family has, and I'm thankful. I have made many mistakes, and most days I feel I've failed my kids in some way, but there have been more opportunities to invest in my kids' character and their relationships with one another than I ever could have dreamed. 

Back when I had a newborn, a two year old and a three year old, I was just surviving. We had two years of all three kids at home before Lily started Kindergarten at age five, and most of those years were a blur. These days homeschooling in a Pandemic have felt like a gift, and in some ways, like I'm getting back those years that felt lost, when we were all together but I was so dead tired I didn't enjoy them as much as I wish.  This season at home has been precious and I'm sure the sibling relationships of my kids are stronger for it, we're more connected as a family because of it, and I'm enjoying motherhood and homemaking more than ever as a direct result. The schools are set to open one week from today but remain optional as social distancing will be in full effect for the rest of the school year. We decided easily to keep them at home for the remainder of the school year, because though hard, it's been that lovely. I long for normalcy to return but I know I will grieve the end of this wild and unique season when it's over. 

Redeeming the Time: 20 Things to do While Social Distancing

We're into our first week of homeschooling and social distancing and I have to be honest - I don't hate it. 

These are very frightening times to be sure, yet the increased and even mandated time at home with those we love is one heck of a silver lining. 

Certainly not everyone has the ability to work from home and hunker down in the way I'm describing - especially health care and essential service workers who are absolute heroes - but for those who are restricted to a work-from-home or simple be home capacity, my hope is we'll spend the time well. One day this will be over (hopefully soon!), and we'll look back on how we spent these days. I really hope to look back on them with fondness, knowing that I followed expert's advice in staying inside, but also that I used the time wisely and fruitfully. 

Here's a simple list of 20 things to do while you're social distancing. For many of us, the time at home is not optional, but the way we spend it is completely in our hands. 

1. Sleep more - even if you're working from home, you'll likely work somewhat reduced hours and choose your hours unlike the typical 9-5. Kids aren't rushing off to school so why not catch up on an hour or two per night? 1 in 3 adults aren't getting enough sleep, but now is likely the best chance you'll get to allow yourself to sleep a full 8 hours (or more!).
2. Master a new skill - I suggest you perfect my sour dough-ish bread recipe! But other ideas are to try out a new instrument or start knitting. 
3. Read the entire New Testament - I have the David Suchet NIV audio version on Scribd and it's 20 hours. Thanks to social distancing you have 20 hours. This is well worth your while! Here's a link for your first two months free on Scribd, fyi!
4. Learn a new language - As someone living in her second language, I assure you it's worth the time to invest in language learning! Oli is trying to learn a third language (Arabic!) on Youtube during the time off school, too.
5. Clean out your closet - I did this to my upcoming summer wardrobe and the kid's too and it was so satisfying. I sell my quality kid's pieces to Boutique Mini-Cycle and give the rest away to charity. 
6. Wash weird things and places - Now, if ever, is the time to deep clean. Not only are you going to be home (and it's much more preferable to be in a clean home, no?), but you also have the time. Today we washed the walls and baseboards. Seriously. It was oddly satisfying.
7. Do facials and hair masks and all the things - self-care alert! Those time-consuming and totally optional beauty activities are really fun when there's nothing else to do.
8. Learn to cook new things - Social distancing means we aren't rushing to the store every time we're out of one ingredient, so use up everything you have first and along the way, stretch yourself with cooking. I plan to explore some of my lesser-used cookbooks and focus on my pantry ingredients.
9. Get back to family dinners - I know my family has a lot of evening work and engagements normally so we are loving the chance to all be home for 6pm supper each night. I light a candle and dust off my secondhand English china and it feels very Norman Rockwell in the best way. 
10. For the married couples out there: have sex every day! Seriously, why not? Didn't see that suggestion coming, did ya? ;-)
11. Read good books - You will eventually get tired of Netflix, and if you don't, well, trust me, it's good to take a break. Favourites I've read in the past year include Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine by Gail Honeyman, Educated by Tara Westover, Hiding Place by Corrie Ten Boom, Major Pettigrew's Last Stand by Simonson, Women and God by Kathleen Nielson, and Bonhoeffer: Pastor, Martyr, Prophet, Spy by Eric Metaxas
12. Don't wear makeup! You're not going out anyway, give your skin a break!
13. Workout at home - Even a simple workout like 10 burpees followed by 10 pushups x 3 will get your heart pumping and muscles awakened
14. Ask questions - of your roomates, spouse, kids, anyone you're stuck inside with, or even friends elsewhere online. Get to know people. 
15. Help a health-care professional - these people are truly on the front lines and we ought to do our best to serve them in any way right now. For my part, I've offered to make lunches for a nurse friend. Anything you can do to ease their stress, give them a bit of respite, and say "thank you".
16. Shop online - I usually love browsing thrift stores and I miss it already, but I've done my shopping online and plan to continue to. My favourite online shop for secondhand and quality clothes is Boutique Mini-Cycle, which satisfies my desire to thrift a bit! I've also bought books from Indigo for the kids, and a new kettle from Canadian Tire. There's no need to be in stores right now!
17. Clean out all of the kitchen drawers - toss that utensil or small appliance you never use, wash the drawers and cupboards, because wow they got disgusting over the years! It's a task you'd probably never do under normal circumstances but feels great to have done.
18. Order takeout - restaurants are being hit very hard financially right now so why not order takeout from your favourite local place? Most restaurants are running at a reduced capacity to comply with the new limits for people gathering in one space but almost every restaurant offers takeaway.
19. Watch your film bucket list - this is the time to re-watch your very favourites (BBC Pride & Prejudice, The Holiday, Count of Monte Cristo), to introduce your kids to the classics (The Hobbit, Lord of the Rings, Harry Potter), and to lessen those screen rules. I'm preaching to myself here!
20. Keep calm and carry on - this too shall pass, and God is still on the throne.

Oli's Birthday Party + Outside-The-Box Friendships

A couple of weeks ago we hosted Oli's birthday party and it was so much fun! We don't always have big birthday parties for our kids and there have been many years where we just did a smaller affair or even simply a family celebration, but this year being Oli's first year at a new school we wanted to meet as many of his friends as possible. Mad Science offered to come and provide the entertainment which was a dream come true for our STEM-loving boy!

Oli is now attending a school for children who are gifted in maths and science, but he's always been drawn to equations, potions, building, and electricity since he was very young. Living in a small urban condo makes hosting big parties really tricky, especially when the weather is too cold to have the party at the nearby park (which is what we have always done for our August and September born girls). When Mad Science reached out and offered to host his birthday party I was so thrilled! Not only are their parties the exact thing Oli and his friends are hugely interested in, but it provided educational entertainment for all of the kids for an hour and a half! The rest of the time was spent opening presents and eating (of course!) 

Oli invited 9 guests to his birthday party (two adult friends who he looks up to, two friends from church, a friend from his old school, and five friends from his new school). This year's birthday party was a big deal for Oli being the new kid, so we wanted him to be able to invite several kids from his class. But we also wanted him to feel free to invite anyone he loved and respected and not worry if they were from his new school specifically. When he suggested friends from his old school and our church we weren't surprised, but when he mentioned two adult friends (also friends of ours who we know from our church) we thought it was so neat! We have many friends who don't have kids of their own but who play a spiritual parental role in the lives of our kids and I think that's such a beautiful thing. We've also always encouraged our kids to think outside the box with friendship - you don't only have to be friends with kids who are the same gender or age, you can have faraway friends who you write letters to and friends at other schools, the important thing is that you love and respect your friends and choose friends who love and respect you. 

Having Mad Science come in freed Brad and I up to spend time getting to know the kids from Oli's new school whereas otherwise we would have been preoccupied with organizing the party, running games and activities and tidying up. Eric, our Mad Scientist, was incredible with the kids and learned all of their names throughout the course of the party. He held their attention for the entire time with fascinating experiments and activities and each child took home their self-made bouncy ball made from the chemical reaction of polymers.

In booking the party parents can select different scientific themes with the option to include an add-on activity such as dry ice or cotton candy. The kids (and frankly the adults too!) were mesmerized by the glasses we wore that cut the colour from any light and the dry ice was such a hit! You can see all of the experiments in the videos I took during the persentation by visiting the archived stories on my Instagram. Mad Science is available throughout North America and caters to science-loving kids ages 5-12. Thank you so much Mad Science for the unforgettable birthday party!

The post was written in collaboration 

with The Mad Science Group

All opinions are 100% my own.

To book a collab, contact me!

My Top Parenting Resources

I'm on my 10th year as a mom, and I've been in the learning process all ten of these years. Any honest parent will tell you they've never truly "arrived" as a parent. Every season of motherhood is different and brings new challenges and requires new knowledge and wisdom, so just as soon as you think you understand your kids well or have it figured out, don't worry, everything will change! This keeps us parents humble and always learning, and if we hope to be wise, it means being open to growing and learning.

I know I've often heard the advice that you don't need advice. Totally an oxymoron, haha! But also I don't agree. We all come into parenting with assumptions, habits, and baggage from our own childhood - some good and some bad. If we never seek advice from others, we're still heavily influenced by others because our upbringing influences us positively and negatively. Seeking advice is so important! Yes, there's something to be said for mother's intuition and your gut instincts, but I firmly believe that there's so much to be gained by asking for help and advice. For my part, I have devoured Parenting books, podcasts, sermons, and tools these ten years and I plan to continue doing so as long as I have children (and grandchildren). I've often been asked to share some favourite books or podcasts on Parenting so I thought I'd arrange everything into one post which I'll update as I discover new resources. If you want to find them on Amazon or to listen to them, click on the links I put in the text and you'll be directed there.

The following have heavily influenced my parenting over the years and I strongly recommend them to you!

Jen and Jeff Wilkin's 6 Part Parenting Class. 

This series of talks has influenced my parenting more than all of the following books combined. I first discovered this resource when we were travelling in France with two babies under age two. I was desperate for some wisdom as our sweet babies were growing into defiant toddlers before our eyes and the added element of being abroad seemed to multiply the stress of it all. One night I did a deep dive into googling all the church websites that I knew of who might have Parenting sermons or talks and I found this series by Jen Wilkin and her husband. This was before Jen Wilkin was a best selling author and national speaker and I didn't know her from anyone, but just a few minutes into the first talk Brad and I knew this would be a foundational resource for us. I have listened to every talk so many times I've lost count and they have taught me so much from disciplining and training a toddler to discussing sex with my kids as they grew older. Like every resource I'll be listing here I am not saying it's infallible. On a personal level, we didn't do everything they did or agree with every bit of advice (example: we didn't spank our kids and we didn't do Santa Claus), but even so I strongly recommend it as one of the very best Parenting resources! The six talks are Shared Faith, Shared Affection & Time, Shared Language, Shared Expectations - Responsibility, Shared Expectations - Obedience, and The Big Picture. Clear your schedule and listen to these talks! 

Paul David Tripp - Parenting: 14 Gospel Principles That Can Radically Change Your Family and Age of Opportunity

If I could choose one book to give to a mom or dad, Parenting would be it. I love Paul Tripp and his constant focus on the gospel. Parenting can easily become moralism and a power struggle without this focus! In Parenting, Paul Tripp uses humble, honest examples from his own life and casts a hope-filled vision for the task before us. Age of Opportunity does the same for parenting teenagers. He brings us back again and again to the grace God lavishly bestows on us and sets the reader on the right path for parenting. 

The Risen Motherhood Podcast

I so badly wish this podcast existed when I was a new mom! It is only a couple of years old but I've been listening to it since the beginning and have loved every episode. Laura and Emily are sisters-in-law and friends and between them have eight kids, including children with special needs. You might remember Laura as a guest writer in my A Day In HER Life series! These women are wise beyond their years and teach on every aspect of parenting from postpartum body image to potty training to marriage struggles all with an eye for the redeeming grace and love of Christ. I have found these 20 minute episodes so helpful and refreshing, and their new book is like a best of compilation of my favourite episodes in written form. Such a great thing to pop on if you're driving or doing chores and the book makes a lovely gift to a first-time mom! My favourite podcast episodes have been the interview with Ruth Chou Simmons, Coffee, Wine & Social Media: Mom, What's Your Crutch?, and the interview with Sally Clarkson.

Sally Clarkson - The Ministry of Motherhood and The Mission of Motherhood

I really love Sally Clarkson! I was given these two books as a young mom and found them so encouraging and helpful both in seeing the important role I had as a mother and the potential and hope for my kid's future. I find Sally Clarkson so wise - she was a missionary in Communist Europe before having four kids in her 30s and 40s. She wrote her first book at 40 as she wanted to really live and learn before writing which I really respect. She's a woman who deeply values tradition, place, and ritual. She reads widely and it shows in her writings. She also has a podcast that I listen to occasionally but these two are my favourite Parenting books of hers.

Gloria Furman - Missional Motherhood and Treasuring Christ When Your Hands Are Full

Gloria Furman is a mom of five and church-planter's wife in Dubai, UAE. She studied at the same seminary as Brad and really knows her theology along with being a passionate primary caregiver to her children. She's such a hero to me, honestly! Missional Motherhood is for all women, even those not yet moms and those who mentor younger women and Treasuring Christ is particularly helpful when you're in the "little years" and needing a nudge to focus on what matters.

Gary Ezzo - Becoming Babywise

This resource is a bit controversial because it's essentially a sleep training manual, which I know some people are not a fan of, but for us we saw this method and this book as such a gift! Having three kids within three years, I would never have survived without sleep and Becoming Babywise gives both babies and their parents the gift of sleep. I've written a lot about what I learned from this book so I'll just share those links here or you can just enter "babywise" in the search engine at the bottom left side of my blog. Babywise had all three of our kids sleeping twelve hours a night without waking by four months old. TWELVE HOURS. In addition to sleeping from 7-7, Babywise helps babies nap very consistently for two hours each nap. The predictability and stability that this brings gave us the energy to keep having babies and to thrive as parents so I can't say enough about it. Of course, it's not for everyone and is really hard (you need to leave your baby to cry it out for nap times, though never at night), but it's well worth it!

The Jesus Storybook Bible

This is the best children's Bible out there! Unlike many kid's Bibles that focus on the moralism, The Jesus Storybook Bible points kids to Jesus in every story from Genesis to Revelation. We started reading this Bible together when I was pregnant with Lily and several times the stories brought tears to both me and Brad's eyes. Ten years on and we're still reading it with out kids and they're still reading it themselves. Our English copy is patched together with tape and the French copy is starting to fall apart too! Our church gives a French copy to every new family at the birth of their first child and I recommend it to every Christian family!

The New City Catechism

This is such a great book and app to help your kid's memorize truths from scripture! We use the app form and put it on the "kids" setting, which has the same questions as the "adult" setting but has more concise answers. Our kids really enjoy doing the questions and answers and I love what they've learned through them. The app is really ideal for on the go teaching moments like when you're stuck in traffic or in a long line at the grocery store.

The Monica Swanson Podcast

This is a new discovery for me and I'm absolutely loving the wisdom and helpfulness in each episode! Monica Swanson is a mom of four boys from ages 9-21 who lives in Hawaii and wrote the book Boy Mom. I started following Monica's blog years ago and always appreciated her musings on motherhood, especially since she's a step ahead of me with older kids. It's called The Monica Swanson Podcast but it's definitely for all parents! 99% of the content is applicable to my daughters too.  I especially loved the episodes Raising Sons with Boundaries and Freedoms and Raising Boys in a Digital World with Ruth Chou Simons. Monica talks in a laid back way with a lifetime of experience and a deep love for God. She's a mom who I admire so much, and listening to her podcast honestly feels like listening to a friend over coffee!

"How do you do it? Do you believe in balance?"

I was so honoured to be interviewed by my friend Hailey Andresen on her amazing blog Household Mag this month and I wanted to share my answers to her questions here as well in case you missed the interview. Her first question is one I've heard in some shape or form for many years and it honestly grieves me to hear it. I'm not a perfect mom and I definitely don't do "it all" whatever "all" is! Here's the question and my response in long form. I'll post the other questions as time allows and I hope they're a blessing for you!

Hailey: As a mom of one, almost two, I am always amazed at how you juggle life with three kiddos, always seem to have your hands in something creative and from what I can tell have a deep, connected relationship with your husband and a healthy relationship with yourself too. So my question to you is, how do you do it? Do you believe in balance?

Me: Ha! No. Honestly, it’s a myth. I think social media has made us believe in the Super Mom idea too strongly, when in reality every mom is doing her best and some have higher capacities than others. I’m an extrovert and I have a high capacity for projects and people, but I also have friends who give their true 100% and have less going on, and we’re both doing great work. I will say that boundaries are so essential and we are a family who are not afraid to lay them down and write out rules that work for us and stick with them.

Juggling three kids who attend two schools for example, meant that we made a firm rule on extra-curriculars – they can do one at a time, or none at all. I know a lot of families whose kids are in three or more activities and I know for us that would be too hectic. We wouldn’t be able to prioritize family game night (Fridays), meals together as a family (ideally four times a week) or church every Sunday with our kids if they were in every activity, so we say no to a lot. Because my husband works longer hours than average (and often evenings and weekends), I stay home to manage the home, along with various side hussels’ as time allows. It wasn’t a choice I was brought up with or ever thought I’d make, but for the sake of family harmony (dare I say balance!?) it made sense for one of us to work significantly less if the other had to work significantly more.

I think families feel a lot of pressure these days to always be achieving and doing and we’ve made a conscious effort to reject that notion. For example, we did zero activities with our kids outside the home before age three. No baby enrichment classes or mom and tot groups of any kind. Not only did we save money to put towards travel, but we also had a very relaxed pace at home as our three little ones were growing up. Three kids in three years forces you to choose what’s important!