7.11.12

26 month speech delay



Honestly, it's been a slow, humbling, refining few months. 

Some days we don't worry at all. We hear amazing stories that encourage us to no end about so-and-so's kid who didn't talk until they were three and we believe she'll be chatting in her own good time. It seems like so many people know someone in our situation, or have been there themselves, and when those stories are shared with us it does wonders for our hearts. Hint: if you have one, tell me!

And then some days, we do. We worry for her. Due to her social skills, empathy, maturity, etc., Autism & Aspergers is ruled out, and we are so thankful for that. Most children with Autism or Aspergers begin with a speech delay, so of course that was our first fear. But it appears that her speech delay is not at all linked since her speech is slowly improving, she mimics sound, and was always a babbler (and only getting louder). If she had Autism or Aspergers, she would likely babble in her infancy, and slowly stop babbling by age one. She certainly wouldn't be gradually gaining sounds, words, or desiring to mimic our intonations, inflections, or sounds. Not to mention she doesn't fit the bill for those disorders in every other category (socially, etc). And we already knew her hearing was excellent as we had it checked a few months back. 


We've also been traveling so much that sitting down with a speech pathologist just hasn't been possible. Now that we're more settled in Montreal for the long haul, we will begin with an evaluation and then go from there. We have been referred to two speech pathologists - both English speakers and both majoring in the physical/motor elements of speech delay. Due to Lily's vast understanding of words and social skills, it's been suggested that her delay is likely physical/motor (meaning something with the shape of her mouth or tongue that makes talking more difficult), so we were thrilled to find two English speech paths in this area. One is local but prefers to work with children over age three, since many kids before then are simply "late talkers" and she doesn't want to jump the gun. Sidenote: I love that this is her approach. I believe that not every child needs to hit the milestones on the exact day and have zero interest in keeping up with the Joneses on the playground. The other is farther away but would see Lily now. We'll have to decide who we go to, and haven't yet. It will likely boil down to availability and cost (though we have some coverage with insurance).


Now, the fun part. Her progress! Last time I blogged about Lily's speech delay, there wasn't much to say in terms of what she had to say. But she's made some great progress and we are so proud of her! Her understanding of words and concepts is huge. It's fun to ask her where certain things are and see her run to them because I'm always shocked at what she knows. Words I've never taught her but that she's just picked up because she's a smart cookie. She's also grown in her ability to understand long sentences, commands, and concepts. I'll give her somewhat complex tasks and she has no problem completing them (go put this object in this place, etc). Go, Lily!
 

She now very clearly says "bye-bye!", "poo-poo" (when she's gone #2, haha!), "mama", "car" (referring to almost anything with wheels), all the animal sounds (she used to only have "woof-woof") and says these all without prompting. With prompting (when we say "Lily, can you say ____") she can say a great deal of words that are mostly gross approximations, but close enough that we count them (such as "teech-a" for teacher). She's also started mimicking me sing. Recently I was singing Row, Row, Row Your Boat to her and she responsed very quietly, almost as if to test it out, "wo wo wo bot". Every attempt that even resembles a word is met with resounding cheers and loads of kisses and clapping. That part is the most fun for everyone :)
 

Where we sit most days is in the land of hope. We are very hopeful for Lily. We have hope because of her intelligence demonstrated non-verbally. We have hope because of her excellent hearing and understanding. We have hope when we hear stories of other kids who were simply "late talkers". We hope she is one of those.

But our deepest hope is in Jesus. That his plan for her is perfect. That his plan for our family is without error. No matter what the diagnosis or future, she'll never be too slow or too quiet. She'll be just right, for Him. He is the author of this speech delay, and it is humbling us. It humbles me when my friend's kids talk circles around her, but I know I need that. My joy in my kids can't be limited to their excelling or their milestones because those things are so fleeting. And if my hope is in Lily and not in Jesus then one day she will ultimately disappoint me, and I'll crush her. Hope isn't meant to be thrown on the backs of people. Hope was designed for Jesus. He brings it. He provides it. He is hope, incarnate.

I'll definitely keep you all abreast on how meeting with the speech pathologist(s) goes in the near future. She is at a point now where she's trying new sounds and words daily. She is hilarious and an absolute joy and we're so proud of the steps she's made.

16 comments:

  1. so great emily and you have such a wonderful heart and mind set about everything!! It sounds like lily is doing wonderfully and so glad to hear of her progress! So she says mama but not dada? Go you! Lots of people say Dada comes first...but I think it should be the other way around ...lol!

    Also - this is random and probably not even related but I remember you saying something about her being tongue-tied when she was born (the only reason I remember is because my niece had the same thing). Do you think that could be related?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It would better explain the situation if she were still tongue tied I think... we had her "tie" snipped because it was prohibiting breastfeeding. Not sure what the speech path will say after a physical exam of her mouth though. Might be!

      Delete
    2. just to clarify, she says Dad and has for a long time (Oli does too), but not towards Brad as a word. If I say "say Dada" she often won't or will say dadada (which doesn't count). When I say where is Dada? she'll run to Brad and definitely knows that's his name, but doesn't say it for him.

      Delete
  2. Anonymous7.11.12

    Emi - an amazing blog...Lilygirl will chat in her own time. She's extremely intelligent (not saying that because I'm her Grandma either) She has an incredible understanding of her surroundings....her extremely loving surroundings.
    When asked to get something or help with something, she knows exactly what is asked of her. She's a social butterfly!

    xoxo

    ReplyDelete
  3. hi love,

    we're so glad to hear about Lily's improvement. Sami & i are sitting at a kitchen table rejoicing alongside y'all.
    Sami said "only lily could pull off those leopard print pants"


    xoxoxoox
    aban

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. some day when you guys have Shakr babies, they will rock leopard.
      love you both <3

      Delete
  4. I grew up with a major speech problem. When I was old enough for school, they considered putting me in a special needs class as they felt I was not properly able to communicate with the other children.

    My mom and dad decided against it, and instead I went to weekly speech therapy at the hospital along with having a speech therapist come into the school on a daily basis.

    Though I still struggle with speech at times (I have a lisp when pronouncing S, TH, F), I am fully able to communicate. I am going to school to become a teacher myself now, so being able to speak is a huge part of my future career.

    I'm sure it will get better. Make her pronounce her words, rather than just making sounds to get what she wants (a big thing my sister did was did the talking for me, which had to be stopped for me to learn), stay positive and don't let others tell you LIly is unable to do anything.

    Praying for you guys!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Thank you all so much! I love blogging because of the community and connections it allows even though many of my readers are from many many hours away - from family, to friends, to strangers. I so appreciate your encouragement and prayers :)

    ReplyDelete
  6. "Hope isn't meant to be thrown on the backs of people. Hope was designed for Jesus. He brings it. He provides it. He is hope, incarnate."

    I love it.

    Prayers for your Lily - she is right where she is meant to be.

    ReplyDelete
  7. We had a late talker. Our firstborn son babbled but did not talk until after his 2nd birthday. One day he said car. He certainly babbled dadada and mamama but he did not use those to refer to either me or his dad. He just babbled. Then, after his second birthday, the words started to come. I worried over it. But I could hear the sounds when he chattered, he understood things, he was very on target otherwise....just no words.

    Now he is in 11th grade, has an enormous vocabulary, and LOVES to talk to people about the things that interest him. We never did speech therapy but I was certainly concerned as I waited it out. Our daughter, born 2nd, started talking by saying "baby" very clearly. I think she was nine months old. Oh, the craziness of waiting it out as a parent! :) Blessings to you as you search out what is best for her.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Beth. I LOVE hearing those stories :)

      Delete
  8. Hi Emily,
    I've been following your blog for a couple months now since being forwarded your link by Amanda Lazarski. I just wanted to comment on how this particular post was an encouragement to me, being that we are sort of on the opposite ends of things. Our 2.5 year old daughter was born with a brain abnormality where we weren't sure she would ever meet any milestones. Currently she is excelling in all areas and ahead in a lot of milestones, for which we rejoice and are thankful, though doctors and researchers of her condition are always telling us to wait for the point where she will start to lag behind others. That being said I wanted to thank you for the reminder that "My joy in my kids can't be limited to their excelling or their milestones because those things are so fleeting" - I so appreciate this. Will be praying for Lily and your family.
    Vicky McPhail

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. honoured to have you reading along Vicky. So happy for your little daughter's progress so far! what a great truth that we Moms need to hear often, eh?

      Delete
  9. I am going to have to show my mom this post & get her intake on this just to see. She started to schools for kids who had development delays & or that just simply were exceptionally bright in one area but struggled in all the rest. She truly has a special gift & I know she will love reading your post. I also struggled with speech growing up & eventually had to go to speech therapy classes. Which helped me tremendously! Only thing left in my speech is a southern twang to some words, for some odd reason even though the rest of my family doesn't have it. But hey it makes me, me! Just like your little one with improve with whatever helps her & she will have her own little personality and voice and ways with words!

    ReplyDelete
  10. I have to agree with Vicky. Thank you for the reminder about not limiting the joy in my child to her excelling. It is so easy to be focused on this but we has humans do not and cannot excel in everything. I thought my daughter would be walking by now (almost 10 months) and took great pride & joy that she would be early but realized it doesn't matter and there is so much to love about the stage she is in now. Plus even if she walks early she may talk late but in the end that is who she is and who she is is perfect :)

    ReplyDelete
  11. Love the paragraph on hope - thanks Em for the reminder to look to Him and trust Him. Matthew is progressing too with his delay, and we rejoiced in December when Autism was ruled out. Keeping ya'll in our prayers.

    ReplyDelete