27.9.18

Would You Ever Change Your Wedding Band?

Three years into my marriage I started wearing a yellow gold chain necklace and it became my signature jewelry. I'm not someone who wears much by way of bobbles - I don't wear earrings, can't stand watches or bracelets, and find most necklaces got in the way of my life with little babies. But this simple yellow gold chain stayed, and is still securely around my neck as I write this, seven years later. I didn't mind that it was yellow and my wedding rings were white gold, but a few years on I became really drawn to yellow gold and it started to bother me. I was already starting to feel uncomfortable with my diamond engagement ring for a few reasons that I'll address in another post, which lead me to thinking about what I would choose for my wedding and engagement rings if I were engaged and married then instead of several years prior.

Allowing my mind to wander one thing I knew for sure, I would not choose white gold. With my warm complexion and blonde hair, yellow gold suited me, and seemed more classic than the white gold I'd chosen a few years earlier. Funnily enough, I always remember thinking my mother's wedding rings were so "old fashioned" being yellow gold. All of the young girls I knew who were getting engaged in the early 2000's had white gold rings and that's what I wanted too. My friends and I even had a nickname for men's wedding bands that were simple yellow gold - "Dad Rings"! I laugh so hard at this now because maybe they still are Dad and Mom Rings, but we're Dads and Moms!


The thing about getting engaged at 21 is that you haven't really discovered your personal style yet. I was engaged and married in the days before Pinterest if you can believe it, so the idea of having anything in your wedding bespoke and unique was foreign to me. Every wedding I attended was more or less identical, and so mine fit the mold exactly. There were only three wedding magazines in circulation that I knew of and they all advertised the same styles, companies, and themes. I knew I'd have a strapless wedding dress and a white gold diamond solitaire because it was all I saw and thought I wanted. There is so much I would change about my wedding looking back, which I'm sure is always the case ten years down the road from any event, but especially since I was married so young and still learning who I was and what I liked. I can't go back and re-marry Brad, though I would always choose him again and again (SWOON), but as we approach our ten year anniversary next month, I started to seriously consider changing my wedding band.

Which brings me to my question. Would you ever change your wedding rings?

This is a question I posed to my Instagram community several months ago and I've returned to ask similar questions in my stories a few more times. The general consensus is very divided and I always receive strong views on both sides, ranging from enthusiastically in favour to fiercely against. I can understand both views and have taken them to heart, and to make my own decision I spent two years considering it and several months talking it over with Brad and other friends who know me well. I prayed about it, thought about it, and asked others for their counsel, and then I made my decision - I would replace my rings for ones I truly loved and felt comfortable with.


Our marriage is stronger than it's ever been, and a piece of jewelry doesn't cement our commitment or weaken it if replaced. It can be seen as wasteful to replace something that isn't damaged or lost, but I wear this ring proudly every day of my life, so shouldn't I love it? When I talked to Brad about it I really had no idea what he would think, but right away he was not only open to the idea but super supportive. I wondered if he would be offended or hurt that I didn't want the ring he gave me as we vowed, 'til death do us part, but he reminded me that those vows were for us, not for our jewelry.


Neither of us are overly sentimental, especially with material goods, so we both agreed that if it was within our budget, we'd replace my rings. My original white gold wedding band was $75 from a pawn shop in Toronto that we bought on a whim a few months into our engagement when we were running late to meet friends for dinner. Buying that ring together is a precious memory that I'll keep forever, but if my tastes have changed a decade on, why not change it? The memory is in tact. Our marriage is thriving. I also love the fact that now I have two wedding bands, so some day I can pass one on to each of my daughters - not planned but a lovely result of replacing my original band! So I started to shop around for a simple yellow gold band, ideally from a shop here in Quebec.

I came across Vaudry Jewelry Co. on Etsy thanks to some friends on Instagram who recommended them for minimalist wedding bands. My wedding band is the hammered 10k yellow gold band stackable ring. It was under $150 and made right here in Quebec, where our whole life as a married couple has been. I love it so much! I love the simplicity of it, the delicate size (my other band was thicker), the hammered details, and especially that it's yellow gold. Though I do have an engagement ring as well, which I'll write about another day, I often wear just my wedding band. I love it so much I can't believe I almost didn't change it for fear of how others might respond. The simplicity fits my style perfectly and I'm thankful every day that I had the courage to do the unconventional thing and change my wedding rings!


Vaudry Jewelry Co. is a small Quebec business I'm proud to collaborate with on this post. Visit them on Etsy and Instagram and fall in love with their minimalist gold pieces!



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