unique time with each one

As soon as we had our second child we felt the tension. The number of children who needed us doubled, but our free time did not. Yet their needs are unique, and can't always be met in groups. Sometimes just the girls need to get away, sometimes just the boys. Sometimes it's one child with both parents, sometimes it's one-on-one.

Now, our kids do most things together, and we all love it that way. The odd time that we take one child out of their shared room (say, if someone's sick) the remaining two melt down. They love being together! But this also makes unique time with one parent, or both of us, so special.

There are two days each week when Oli is home with me and Lily is at school. Often I'll set Chloe up with some activities and leave her at home (where Brad is working) and take Oli out for some one-on-one time. This week Lily has three days off school for various reasons, so it was her turn to get some mom-time. Mondays are Brad's day off, so he'll spend one week taking Lily out to lunch or on a picnic during lunch break, and the other doing something just with Oli. Chloe gets the most time with us right now because she's home full time, but once she starts pre-school we'll have to make sure she gets unique time too.

It's so amazing getting to know my kids on a personal level without any influences around. No friends, no siblings, no media. Just us. Usually we'll go on a bike ride or to a coffee shop. We might address some behaviors that have cropped up and need to change, or celebrate a mile-stone, or just ask each other funny questions and play I Spy.

It's something I'm glad we're starting now, because I'd love to continue it for their whole lives :)


  1. Love this. It's definitely something Sam and I want to do with our kids. I wondered what types of activities you set Chloe up with when you leave her at home while Brad works to go have one on one time with Oli or Lily?

  2. Hey! Good question. I used to time unique time with my big kids around her napping at home while B was home working which was perfect and lasted a long while. Most kids still nap til age 3-4 so you could bet on doing it that way for a WHILE but C quit napping at age 2 (😩😩😩), so now it's activities. Setting her up at her age (2 yrs, 3 months) simply means having a little snack, a potty nearby, and a few activities like blocks, books, the play kitchen and play food on hand, etc. Usually we put the little gate up at her door so she can't roam the house freely but leave the pen

  3. *** door open, so brad can hear her easily (his workspace is just a few feet from their room)